Coping with the Confluence of Cancer, Chemo, and COVID 19–A Testimony, Part II
By Rev. Dr. Letitia Williams-Watford, 9th Episcopal District
Amid the COVID-19 pandemic, I am a survivor of an aggressive stage 3 cancer. Yet, in the waning days of the initial 120-day phase of my treatment plan, I am now doing a victory lap. I have emerged from the harrowing abyss of mental and physical pain and suffering known as chemotherapy and I still have joy.
From the day of my diagnosis, Jesus said my sickness was not unto death and that I would live to tell my journey. Furthermore, he said the battle before me was not mine but his. I was to “soldier on” as a soldier on assignment with my commanding officer being the Lord, the Lord of Hosts, and the Lord Sabaoth. My assignment was to extrapolate and expound upon the Kingdom’s purpose in a journey such as mine—not calling attention to myself but calling attention to the Lord to whom the glory belongs. This is a call to transparency some might find jarring.
The nature of my treatment has been cyclical. I was in a bad way. Conversely, I was also in a good way. When I could pray, I prayed for me. When I couldn’t pray, others prayed for me. When I could go to work, I went to work. When I couldn’t go to work, I did not go to work. At every point, whatever the good, bad, or indifferent, I sought to give God glory.
Surprisingly, telling my truth as it was has led some to attribute some extraordinary measure of courage to me. In and of myself, I am not so much as courageous as I am fortified. With every plunge into the abyss of suffering, I looked for my commanding officer to bring me up and out and He has. With every respite from the abyss, I looked to my commanding officer to use that season to fortify me for the next challenging stretch and He has.
I am sharing my testimony because the call to soldier on is a universal one. No one signs up for cancer, chemotherapy, COVID-19, unemployment, bankruptcy, abandonment, betrayal, or any of the myriad of life’s maladies and misfortunes. Yet and still, some catastrophic, life-altering experience is on each of our horizons. At that juncture, we can choose to cave in to “Why me? Why now? Why not them?” Or, we can choose to soldier on, in agreement with Lord Sabaoth, knowing that the battle is His and not ours.
I am a survivor because the Lord says so. If I am courageous, it is because the Lord makes me so. I chose to answer the call to soldier on, for as Sir Isaac Watts once aptly put it: “Sure I must fight, if I would reign. Increase my courage Lord. I’ll bear the toil, endure the pain, supported by thy Word.”
Beloved, whatever the Lord of Hosts has done for me, the Lord of Hosts can do for you. At the juncture of your next life challenge, I pray you will be of good courage and make the choice to soldier on. As you soldier on, I pray you, too, will give God glory.
The Rev. Dr. Letitia Williams-Watford is the presiding elder of the Tuskegee District, NE Annual Conference, Ninth Episcopal District, Bishop Harry L. Seawright, presiding prelate.
