Running On Empty

Rev. Dr. Alfonso Wyatt, Columnist

Most cars have a feature that will let the driver know when fuel is running out. For some people, it is a sign to get gas at once. For the more mathematically astute, it is an opportunity to calculate how many more miles they can travel before running out of gas. I remember my shock driving to an appointment and not noticing my low-fuel indicator light was on. I was in heavy traffic and faced the real possibility of running out of gas. At this point, all I could focus on was getting off the bridge and finding a gas station as I wondered how long I had been running on empty.

I want to talk to people with responsibilities over other people’s well-being. You are a tested leader, a symbol of strength with a desire, mission, and calling to come through for others, especially when things are tough. You go without sleep so others can sleep. You push yourself beyond exhaustion. You ignore old aches or new pains; you take the late-night and early-morning calls, and if there are no calls, you do wellness checks. The concept of having “me time” is just that, a concept rooted in blissful yesterdays. However, the push to be in charge, answer questions, respond to incessant needs, skip dinner, and try to attend to family and personal needs has you running on empty.

Let me take you back to when I discovered my low fuel indicator light was on and see if there are some tips that can help readers. I first looked for a gas station (you must do the things that help you refuel). I then filled up the tank (make time for self-care). I tried to be mindful moving forward of how much gas I had in the tank before driving and not wait until the fuel indicator light came on before refueling (proactive health strategies). Beloved, if you are running on empty by desperation or choice, it won’t be long before you run out of fuel. If there was ever a time for conscious and consistent self-care, the time is now because it is clear that the incessant demands of the day will not cease.

Let me say, leader to leader, please don’t take pride in being able to run on fumes by denying yourself rest when rest is called for. You may have convinced yourself from a sense of duty or pressure that it is difficult to slow down. If you don’t take proper care of yourself, you cannot take care of others, no matter how hard you try or how desperate the situation. Also, know that our body will take rest (out of nowhere, you become bedridden) if you do not rest. It is amazing the number of people in helping professions feel guilty about taking care of themselves. One of the best things a person can do to take care of himself or herself is to get a good night’s sleep. There is a price to pay for only getting three or four hours of sleep. Getting rest helps the body rebuild for the next day’s demands. The body also uses sound sleep as the time to rebalance body functions–so get that laptop or cellphone out of the bed.

We are still in unprecedented times marked by congregational, economic, political, social, community, and family challenges. No one person, no matter how dedicated, responsible, gifted, or called, can solve the present and looming challenges on the horizon no matter how long he or she stays up. With that said, it is imperative for pastors, lay leaders, parents, and decision-makers who have responsibility over the lives of others to make sure you first take responsibility for your own life. Beloved, the question before you is direct and clear; if you know you are depleted, will you stop to fill up your spiritual, mental, or physical tanks, or have you already calculated how far you could go running on empty?

And I say, “O that I had wings like a dove!  I would fly away and be at rest;

Psalm 55:6