A Journal Reflection from the Mind of Syphio

“A Fool and Her Money”

“And Forgive us Our Debts, as we Forgive our Debtors.” [Matthew 6:12]

Syphio A. B. Whack

Growing up, I often heard my mother say, “A fool and money are soon parted.” As a child, I didn’t fully understand who the fool was or why their money was being separated from them. As a young girl growing up with two older brothers, life was not easy; most of my clothes were either hand-me-downs or from the thrift store, except for one new outfit for back-to-school and a new dress for Easter.

           For reasons unknown, I find myself this morning, journeying down memory lane and remembering the hurt I felt early one Christmas morning when I witnessed the joy of my two brothers who received shiny new red bicycles from the Western Auto store. As I waited for my new bike to be rolled in from the porch, my Momma said “Baby our credit was not enough to get a new bike for you, but one of my friend’s daughters outgrew her bicycle and it’s outside on the porch. But don’t worry baby when we pay the account down some, we’ll get you a new bicycle.”

My Momma’s eyes were filled with tears, not wanting to make her feel any worse, I rolled the green bicycle with the bent, rusted rear fender, off the porch, and down the steps without putting a coat on or getting dressed. I wanted my Mama to think that I was happy, even though inside I was hurt that my bike was used and had a bent, rusting rear fender.

 As I pushed the bicycle up and down the lane, (that’s all I could do was push, because I had not yet learned how to ride a bicycle.) I pushed with a broken heart and tear-filled eyes that my mother never saw.  By God’s Grace and Mercy, there were no girls my age who lived down the Lane where I lived, and since I didn’t know how to ride a bicycle, my used, rusting, bent fender, bicycle never left the dirt lane to our house.

           When we returned to school, we were required to stand and tell the class what we got for Christmas. I said, “I got a bike” and sat down. That day, I proposed in my heart and mind that if I ever had money, I would give it to everyone in need who asked. It did not take me long in my adult life to realize the depth of the statement, “A Fool and Money are Soon Parted.”

It was a cold, windy, and rainy October day, when a church member called me, saying that she was in jail and needed eight hundred dollars to be released. I explained to her that I needed to call my husband at work and ask for his permission before making a transaction for that amount. The good church sister stated that my husband was her Deacon, and she did not want anyone in the church to find out about her incarceration, because of her status as a minister in the church she asked that I be discreet, she had already spent a day and a half in jail before calling.

It never entered my mind to enquire as to why she had not called one of her family members. Suddenly I had an epiphany of my childhood promise to help anyone in need who asked for help. Realizing the situation, my husband consented to loaning her the money. I drove 14.5 miles to the next county; let us not forget that it was a cold, windy, rainy day.

On my way to the next county, I stopped at the bank to get the money from our account. During that time, you could only do a withdrawal transaction for a certain amount at the drive-up window, I got out of the car, and walked in the windy, cold rain, into the bank. As I walked back to my car, a strong, whipping wind blew my umbrella upward, so by the time I reached my car, I was dripping wet from head to toe.

When I arrived back at the jail, I noticed the parking area was so flooded that the water rippled down from the parking lot to the street. Without an umbrella, I made my way to pay the bond for a good church sister who was in need. However, at the bonding window, I was informed that additional charges had been added. Therefore, the bond amount had increased from eight hundred dollars to one thousand three hundred dollars.

 Returning to my car, I returned to the bank, parked the car, and walked into the bank, dripping wet, teeth shuttering, the bank teller remarked “What happened to you?” I immediately reminded myself of the need to “kill the flesh daily,” I smiled and replied, “My umbrella had a date with the wind.”

After the two-hour wait for the good sister to be released, we hugged and cried, she repeatedly thanked me and promised to repay the loan within three weeks. It has been twenty-four years since I loaned money to the church sister.  Our paths have crossed many times over the years; she assures me she hasn’t forgotten about the loan. I always respond politely, trying to resist the urge to act out of anger. I will admit that during one of our brief encounters, I felt like giving in to my fleshly desires and retaliating as Celie Johnson suggested in the movie “The Color Purple,[i]” when she told Sophia to “Beat Him” I am grateful that I did not yield to the temptation. I reminded myself that just as God forgave us of our debts, we too must forgive the debts of others.

I realize now that my decision to lend that amount of money without a written agreement was not wise. It is my prayer that someone reading this will learn from my mistake, as failure to do so could result in the “parting” of your money and their friendship.”

Reverend Syphio A. B. Whack currently serves as an Associate Minister at the Bethel African Methodist Episcopal Church, in Summerville, SC: the Reverend Lorraine Fields–Bradley, senior Pastor.

[i] The Color Purple – 1985 American epic directed by Steven Spielberg and written by Menno Meyjes